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What's the difference between your wife and a whale? Maybe 10 pounds.
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You grow on people. So does cancer.Comment
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Your momma is so short, when Santa sees her he says: "Hey, go back to work!".Comment
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How does an IT nerd greet people to his house? Welcome to 127.0.0.1.Comment
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There are a lot of female hormones in beer. After seven, I have a hard time driving a manual car and I start behaving erratically.Comment
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You must have a nice butt because when you walk away people always say: "What an ass".Comment
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Your mama is so fat, she ran down the street after a schoolbus thinking it was the largest Twinkie ever.Comment
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Sure women live longer than men, but they spend that extra time at awkward bridal and baby showers wishing they were dead, so it's a fair trade.Comment
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Your family is so stupid, during the Civil War, your great grand uncle fought for the West.Comment
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In a competition of logics for blondes, a random number generator won.Comment
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Why did the chicken cross the road? To flee from KFC.Comment
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Ugh, who has the thing to workout? (...leaving for an hour nap)Comment
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Been trying to eat my T-shirt for an hour, says made in Turkey.Comment
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Your mama is so stupid she actually thinks you're smart.Comment
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If fortune turns her back on you, f*** her up the a**.Comment
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F*cebook memories are a great way to see how fatter you keep getting.Comment
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To avoid a collision, just run into another car.Comment
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Your parents hated you so much, your bath toys were a hairdryer and a toaster.Comment
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How do you milk tons of sheep? Release a new Iphone model at an insane price.Comment
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You know birds can't see glass. Neither can blondes.Comment
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