Jokes corner

[Conjurator]

What are a blonde's first words after graduating college? Would you like fries with that?

[Conjurator]

Here's 15$. Drink until I look very good then come talk to me.

[Conjurator]

I heard you're good at algebra. You probably can give me 3X without asking Y.

[Conjurator]

What do a monk and a christmas tree have in common? Their balls are just for decoration.

[Conjurator]

Why is there so much blood in my alcohol system?

[Conjurator]

You're so ugly that on last Halloween you weren't disguised and everyone told how scary your costume was.

[Conjurator]

Your hair is so greasy, you could survive wartime food shortage with the fried chicken.

[Conjurator]

The Idiot College called, they want their mascot back.

(Unvoluntary highlight here, lol)

[Conjurator]

Women were born to woo men, but often they woe men.

[Conjurator]

What has two legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

[Conjurator]

I never knew the true meaning of happiness until I got married, then it was too late.

[Conjurator]

You seem like the kind of person who used to open the wrong side of the milk carton in grade school.

[Conjurator]

Father: I see your grades are struggling young man.
Son: Yep, just like your trousers button.

[Conjurator]

Why do people get married? Because otherwise they can't divorce.

[Conjurator]

Your mama is so fat that when she stepped on the scale, it said: "I need your weight, not your social security number".

[Conjurator]

Intimacy is selfish. Into me, see?

[Conjurator]

The grass is always greener on the other side, probably because it's fertilized with bullshit.

[Conjurator]

Useless trying to correct a mistake, focus your efforts on making new ones.

[Conjurator]

I'm not a stalker, I'm just a volunteer very private investigator.

[Conjurator]

What has four legs, is green, is fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.