If it's a bar restaurant you can gauge them by ordering food with your drinks. Drink dates are more unclear because it can turn into a dinner date but it'll depend on the man. I was watching a video of a dating coach who uses drink dates as tests. She'll ask the guy about the food on the menu and if the guy says something like "I'm not hungry" to push her to drinks she gets up and leaves.
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How do you effectively build and maintain a roster of men?
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The IG generation has made finding a man a lot worse than it needs to be.
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Originally posted by colorfulaura View Post
The drink dates are low effort but I can't stand anything more than coffee "dates." It's like meeting up for a job interview for a real date.
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The drink dates are low effort but I can't stand anything more than coffee "dates." It's like meeting up for a job interview for a real date.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
I have officially deleted Bumble as of yesterday. Partially because these men online aren't exciting me and I realized that I was only on there out of pure boredom. I deactivated all my social media and have been off for 3 weeks now, so I needed some sort of attention, LOL. But I have a target and he's helped me get rid of these dating apps since scoring him is my goal. It's actually a motivator for me, haha. I know this sounds weird on the outside looking in but I'm not sure how to explain it without giving myself away.
A lot of men no longer put in effort because women are okay with accepting the bare minimum. A lot of this shit is the fault of women with low standards. When you meet enough women who are okay with having drinks and pretending it's a date, you're going to put two and two together and think this is what most women want these days. Cheap women ruin it for the rest of us who appreciate effort. BUT it also helps cut out the wrong guys.
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I have officially deleted Bumble as of yesterday. Partially because these men online aren't exciting me and I realized that I was only on there out of pure boredom. I deactivated all my social media and have been off for 3 weeks now, so I needed some sort of attention, LOL. But I have a target and he's helped me get rid of these dating apps since scoring him is my goal. It's actually a motivator for me, haha. I know this sounds weird on the outside looking in but I'm not sure how to explain it without giving myself away.
A lot of men no longer put in effort because women are okay with accepting the bare minimum. A lot of this shit is the fault of women with low standards. When you meet enough women who are okay with having drinks and pretending it's a date, you're going to put two and two together and think this is what most women want these days. Cheap women ruin it for the rest of us who appreciate effort. BUT it also helps cut out the wrong guys.
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Originally posted by PumpedUpKids View Post
Bingo. I find women complain about it too and I side eye them. I'm just like so you don't want the best. I hate the idea of women building a man. If I wanted build something I can buy legos. I'm not about to put that much time into a man.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
Yup. The key is not to ask, but be with a man who wants to give you everything just because you're his. Not because you asked. He sees how well you take care of yourself and only wants to add to that. My issue is how some women don't like asking for what they need from men (example: if she needs a new car tire). You should be able to ask your man for that. If you're too afraid, there's something wrong there.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
Yup. The key is not to ask, but be with a man who wants to give you everything just because you're his. Not because you asked. He sees how well you take care of yourself and only wants to add to that. My issue is how some women don't like asking for what they need from men (example: if she needs a new car tire). You should be able to ask your man for that. If you're too afraid, there's something wrong there.
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Originally posted by PumpedUpKids View Post
Bingo. I find women complain about it too and I side eye them. I'm just like so you don't want the best. I hate the idea of women building a man. If I wanted build something I can buy legos. I'm not about to put that much time into a man.
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Originally posted by PumpedUpKids View PostIt's actually has gotten harder for me. Before I had men in different zipcodes, but these men can be so damn lazy that I'm like no thanks before we even get to a date.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
The only men who complain about gold digging are men who have no gold to dig for. It is *only* right for women to dig for gold.
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Originally posted by Ildergreier View PostI would never ask a man for money or things or anything, because I have everything I need, but if I needed it I would not hesitate.
Why?
Because I have never meet a man that would hesitate to ask a woman for sex, food, borrowing her car, sigarettes, stay over some days or something else.
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Originally posted by colorfulaura View Post
This is true. But the truth is they're like this is because it's been working for them. Low effort men are still in high demand. We have to accept our reality as having higher standards will cut our dating pool in half or more. This is a good thing though, instead of taking a bum on a date we could be spending time on bettering ourselves.
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Originally posted by PumpedUpKids View Post
Would never be me. I hate that it's called gold digging. No it's common sense especially since most men want you to have their big headed babies, so why can't you take care of me. I deserve to be spoiled. I think every woman deserves it, but most don't believe their own hype. I believe mine.
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I would never ask a man for money or things or anything, because I have everything I need, but if I needed it I would not hesitate.
Why?
Because I have never meet a man that would hesitate to ask a woman for sex, food, borrowing her car, sigarettes, stay over some days or something else.
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Originally posted by PumpedUpKids View PostIt's actually has gotten harder for me. Before I had men in different zipcodes, but these men can be so damn lazy that I'm like no thanks before we even get to a date.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
Maybe you dodged a bullet after he got mad that you didn't want to go back to his hotel? Was he at least respectful?
I love those types of men. The ones that like to take care of their women and still value old world traditions. I just can't get down with this modern, 50/50 guys. I dry up faster than the Sahara desert whenever I hear of women shelling out money for/with men. *shivers* I mean, if it works for them, then fine but it couldn't be me!
And that's why dating will always be harder for women with higher standards bc a lot of men aren't even worth the stressors that come with relationships. I'd very much prefer to stay single than to not have exactly the man I want. Maybe that's also why a roster is hard for me because I'm not just giving any man attention, let alone including him in a roster. You need to hit every. single. bullet point. And I don't care. LOL.
Would never be me. I hate that it's called gold digging. No it's common sense especially since most men want you to have their big headed babies, so why can't you take care of me. I deserve to be spoiled. I think every woman deserves it, but most don't believe their own hype. I believe mine.
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It's actually has gotten harder for me. Before I had men in different zipcodes, but these men can be so damn lazy that I'm like no thanks before we even get to a date.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
I like this and agree with some of it. This makes me realize having a roster would be quite easy for me... if I lived in Manhattan! Everything would be much easier if I lived there, which is why I'm planning to move.
Also, for the 3rd one, my rule is that I don't mention it if they don't ask. I don't want to volunteer information, because I'm sure there aren't either. Now, if they ask me if I'm seeing anyone, I'll tell them that as far as I'm concerned, I'm single, so I'm enjoying my time with men who are interested in me until one decides that they want to be in a committed and monogamous with me. They have no choice but to accept that answer and now that he knows there are other men in the picture, it might light a fire under his ass or he will cancel himself out, LOL. Bc as you said, a lil' competition never hurt a man!
ETA: Wait, I don't know how I missed #2 or maybe I read it to fast but I'd prefer not to be friends with someone I looked at romantically. I don't think that's possible. You can't cross the friendship line then casually go back, unless you want drama. Those things usually fizzle out.
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