DESPERATE TIMES PLEASE HELP!!

[galacticfish]

Hi all,

So I started using mones again after a hiatus. I don't know where to begin so I suppose I'll give a bit of backstory (it's long sorry!)

I recently transferred to another university (last semester) and I'm living in the dorms. Only problem is, I haven't made a single friend on my floor with the exception of my roommate. But even then, I think that's just situational and we wouldn't be close if we weren't living together. In the fall when everyone's the most social, I was in an unhealthy long distance relationship in which I invested ALL of my time. In short, I stayed holed up in my room and ended up not making any friends on my floor. My relationship eventually went down the drain and I was left with a few close friends (from other buildings) and a handful of acquaintances whom I never hung out with outside of class or frats. I was okay though because I had those 1-2 close friends and we hung out all the time.

New semester rolls around and I haven't made a single contact in any one of my classes and although I love the friends that I have now, seeing the same 3 people over and over again gets dull and you just run out of things to talk about. Basically, I'm lonely and bored and filled with regret for not making friends with my floormates especially since they all seem friendly and nice and fun and walking all the way to my current friends' dorms for the sake of companionship is a hassle since it's far and it's always below freezing outside. Cold approaching my floormates is out of the question and talking to them now is just plain awkward and uncomfortable. I think I've given off the impression that I want absolutely nothing to do with them..it's not I swear :(They've also formed a tight knit clique that would probably be hard to penetrate by now. I think I'm dipping into a depression from my loneliness/boredom/lack of socializing and I would really prefer that not to happen again (LDR caused some similar issues)

I would also like to add that I think I have some sort of mild undiagnosed social anxiety...It's not bad enough that I need therapy but it's getting in the way of my happiness now. Either that or I'm just stupidly shy. (I'm super chill and loud when I get comfortable though)

So my question is, what can I do to improve my situation (befriend my floormates mainly but this also extends to life to in general)? What kind of mones do y'all recommend? And all my positive self talk has been futile so please don't say this is something I need to figure out without mones because I just feel so hopeless and sad right now.

I currently only have the connections oil but I've used bliss, vibe, flirt, loveboat, dm+, and odyssey. Being a broke student, I can't afford that much. Which solo/combo (not limited to the ones listed above or unisexy mones) gives the most bang for the buck in the context of my situation? And more importantly, how should I use the mones to the fullest potential since I've never used them to meet people before? (Specific advice would be appreciated)

THANK YOU!!

[theLaw]

Welcome Galacticfish,

Others women will provide some mone suggestions, so I'll just give you my $.02 based on your post.

Unfortunately, it sounds like mones aren't going to solve your problem, but perhaps some counseling would help. Also getting involved in activities off-campus will give you some direction without being dependent on the school.

Mones can make others open up to you, but there is a reason that you keep people at a distance; until you figure that out, all the mones in the world won't change anything, your brain will just find a way to work around them.

Finally, keep in mind that higher educational institutions are designed to extend adolescence, and keep you from living fully in the real world. You will not find a single adult living in the dorms.........just kids, waiting to grow up.

The real world is happening all around you...............just outside of that imaginary line (campus).

One last item.........for anxiety: https://raypeatforum.com/community/t...-not-low.7021/

Cheers!

[BigDickBoss69]

higher educational institutions are designed to extend adolescence, keep you from living fully in the real world. not a single adult living in the dorms...just kids, waiting to grow up., very well put

[Ragnar Lothbrook]

Great insight theLaw. galacticfish I am not familiar with the female mones, so I will give you my advice from a men's mone perspective. I too have been in and out of depression with and without friends especially at work, for awhile. XiSt, and Ascend saved my professional life. I feel like not only my status, but my attitude has been reset as well. I also spray SOB under my pits every day before deodorant, and this whole mix is like caffeine to my skin, a bounce in my step that wasn't there before. I think if you find your jam you'll end up in a good place as well. Personally, I noticed nothing from Odyssey, and connections has started painfully honest conversations with me. I stay away from those two.

[catmand0]

There are many different options here but I must say that Celebrity seems to be the best in this case. It will make people want to talk to you and be more interested in forming connections with you. If you combine Celebrity with Connections you could make friends with anyone with a smile! If you're not very talkative you can get others to do more of the talking by adding Vibe to the mix.

[TongRen]

Regret is a hell of a thing. Mones won't act as a crutch, they are the garnish. Get out there, join some clubs, cook in the kitchen (if your dorm has them). Leave your door open when possible.

After that...try some Bliss oil, Flirt oil and Limitless for when you need to be studying (solo or in groups). And let go of regret. It does nothing for you.

[KateD]

Galactic! I hope that your situation got brighter and that you are in a better place right now. I believe the suggestions, advise and mone tips are all good.

I think it's a thing now where we diagnose ourselves and put ourselves in boxes for being different and struggling with Life. Life happens to everyone and no one is perfect and no one has their shit totally together. Most times, ppl pretend and it just makes other people feel like failures.

Reality is, we all have down times and these down times can last a while. Self pity is not a disease and its a thing we all go through and it is easier than you think to get out of

The first step just like exercising is the hardest

Any one of the mones you use will be fine and these are my suggestions :

1. You can't change the past so worrying about it, won't help
2. As long as you have life, you can make a change it all depends on you
3. Regret nothing and move on
4. Start by doing some healthy and friendly routines. Most schools have gyms and it is a great place to meet people and get some positive juices flowing
5. Study groups , parties , socials , manage your time and make time for these, getting loads of friends won't happen overnight but people will start to notice you mingling
6. A handful of good friends is better than a 100 friends that can be entertaining and detrimental to your school life or future
7. Do the above for you and everything else will follow. If you can't enjoy your own company and you are just a bag of depressed, negative energy no one will want to be around you , not for long anways

Over all, the key here is getting out of your funk, start to just push yourself to get into activities that benefit you and make you feel great and take it one step at a time

[drlove]

Hi, I don't want to give away too much about my "identity" so just trust that I know what I am talking about here. First, I agree with all of the responses above. The mone choices are all sound, and will amp-up your social status. However, as thelaw mentioned, for results to accrue, you need to "put out" as well, etc. I like KateD's suggestions on how to do it. There is also help available for social anxiety as noted by other responses. However, in my view: enjoy the fact that you are not distracted by relationships (on whatever level) at this point in your life. You are in school for an education. Focus on that. Be the best you can at what you are studying. Ace your exams. That increases social status and wins friends like nobody's business. Rise to the top academically (and don't be embarrassed when your instructors let it be known ). Be #1. Academic success in your environment can help attract friends. Relax. It will all come in its time. Note: Do NOT forget about mones - you are smart. They work. Just keep your head down on your studies. People admire a person with focus who knows his/her priorities. Sometimes, if you obsess about it, you repel the very thing you want. Do you read Deepak Chopra? Read his 7 laws of success. If you have the opportunity to use mones in social settings, daily wear, etc., do it. But don't stress. Gotta run - good luck, and feel free to hang out with your friends here on DiscoveryXS forums