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IHateAnalzbutluv69 Why not talk to her?
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Im shy to make the first approach. As always...that's why I have been single for 4years..even my ex is the one who made the first approachComment
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I have this same approach issue, I don't really know what to say. We need our own personal Scottie2Hottie on our shoulders.
Maybe some of the ladies of the forum can give us some approach tips. somechick99 NuTrix Isis lafemmeComment
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I don't think appearance matters as much for women as it does for men from what I've seen. Confidence can go a LONG way. I've occasionally found myself attracted to men who were probably average at best. What gravitated me towards them was their confidence. And not the boasting bravado type. I mean, real confidence.
If you see someone throwing out signals, just approach her. If her responses are clipped and she's not making eye contact, just move on. You'll never see her again. It's nothing to fear.
I know different women like being approached differently. Some like funny, cheesy lines others don't. So go into it wanting to have a genuine conversation and gauge what direction to take once you get a feel. Personally, I'm very receptive and open to men who seem to just want to have a conversation with me. When men don't seem pressed on taking it to the next level, it intrigues me. But! Don't play this stage out too long or interest will waver. If she's throwing out signals, escalate.
Reiterating confidence. Don't fear rejection! Plus, if you go into it with the intention to have a conversation and she snubs you or is being rude. I think it makes it easier to handle the rejection. Cause WTF. You were just trying to have a convo.
I mean of course there are women who like funny, charming, smooth etc etc but if that doesn't describe you, I wouldn't force it and would take the conversation route. While I am definitely attracted to silver tongued men first and foremost and reject all other forms of approach; I, 5 out of 5 times open up to people who seem to just want to have a genuine conversation. Activate your curiosity and ask her about herself. Our favorite topic is our self.Comment
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Isis Very useful info. Thank you. I get that a lot by my friends, "You should approach her. You're not gonna see her again anyway if you get rejected so what you have to lose?" And it's really true because I never get to see those girls I eyed on again.Comment
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Yeah, I feel awkward approaching because I think too much.
I mean who wants to really go up to a woman with the sheer reality of: 'hey, I'm approaching because I'm attracted to you and I'm hoping that if you aren't an evil person we could be something possibly. Can I get your name and number so i can google you and stalk you secretly while I make a decision on whether or not your the one to go after.'
Dumb brain.
I'm partly kidding btw
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Miss Isis, is on to something. An uglyish man (in person) with confidence, has a much better chance catching my attention than an average looking man on an app. I will say my online picker is much different than my real life picking. Yes!"He really should have given LaFemme some cash too. It's obvious he was a cheapskate and selfish." -MuestereateComment
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Well...where r u guys from?Comment
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I'm in the boat, "there's a zillion of us. Try one. If she's a no, you'll know....try the next". The more you do the less anxious you'll be. It's unfamiliar. Once approaching someone becomes more familiar, it will become natural. And Isis is right, start with conversation. Judge the individuallike you would anyone at any gathering or encounter. Take the pressure off yourself
You're never too old to learn NuTrix ^_~Comment
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So based on this wonderful information anyone put the tips to use?Comment
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Yes! Years ago I just began walking up to random people in different places, men, women, all ages. Hit and run style, lol. Department stores, grocery, bar, club, parks, even stuff like when sitting in a waiting room for an oil change on my car...just engaging often, getting comfortable. Had my fair share of people giving me, litterally, the silent treatment with a "what the hell are you talking to me for" glare
It helped me to see how often, yeah, it's NOT me, it's THEM, with the issue or chip on their shoulder...or more walls up than I was willing to climb ober, lol...and who wants to hang with that? Move along. Plus all that randomness made it easier when a prospect of interest came along. AAAAAAAND made it easier to walk away when there just wasn't mutual interest. There are usually almost instant IOIs, even if it's just to have a conversation of mutual interest, not necessarily, "let's think about a relationship" ^_^ My 2c.
You're never too old to learn NuTrix ^_~Comment
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Thanks Nutrix, great stuff. I appreciate both you, Isis and Lafemme's input. Its pretty gold..and its not often we get to get that view. One of the many reasons I follow womens journals too.
Yes! Years ago I just began walking up to random people in different places, men, women, all ages. Hit and run style, lol. Department stores, grocery, bar, club, parks, even stuff like when sitting in a waiting room for an oil change on my car...just engaging often, getting comfortable. Had my fair share of people giving me, litterally, the silent treatment with a "what the hell are you talking to me for" glare It helped me to see how often, yeah, it's NOT me, it's THEM, with the issue or chip on their shoulder...or more walls up than I was willing to climb ober, lol...and who wants to hang with that? Move along. Plus all that randomness made it easier when a prospect of interest came along. AAAAAAAND made it easier to walk away when there just wasn't mutual interest. There are usually almost instant IOIs, even if it's just to have a conversation of mutual interest, not necessarily, "let's think about a relationship" ^_^ My 2c.Comment
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