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Looking for advice on combinations

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  • Looking for advice on combinations

    Hi all, I just joined here, but have been using 'mone for years. Was active on another site, but found this site and you guys rock!
    so, I just put in my first order here (Love boat, limitless, glow, Xist, Madame & Connections) (wish list of samples from BabeXS, Innocence, Sweetness and Sexy Confidence)

    Here is my dilemma (warning... VERY LONG! proceed at your own risk!)
    There is a guy (isnt there always a guy??)
    We worked together years ago, didn't really know each other then. Fast forward 16 years & I get a job in a new town and move there. Its his town. I am now divorced, he was widowed about 3 years ago. I move down the street from him, and right next door to his best friend.
    We start running into each other at different events around town.
    We get along very well. I get invited to cookouts at the neighbors, it is obvious that the neighbor is trying to throw us together. The crush is an introvert and shy. But every time we are together we always end up huddled side by side having these deep philosophical or 'feeling' based conversations. One time at a cookout, I went in to get another glass of wine and when I came out everyone had played musical chairs and the only available seat was next to the crush.

    At one point i pulled my neighbor aside and asked him to calm down a bit on the fixing up since I felt it made the crush uncomfortable
    "no it doesnt"
    "Yes, I think it puts him in an awkward position"
    "nope, he is ok with it"

    So the more i get to know him, the more I like him. He is such a good person and dad, smart,funny. So basically i am falling for him.He has not put himself out there since his wifes death. (cancer, very traumatic for him and his son)

    One week right before Christmas he texted me that he had visited my old boss from where he still work, in the hospital. I didnt know she was in, I went to see her and the first thing she asked me was "are you and X dating?"
    "No, why?"
    "all he did was talk about how great you are."

    Later that week he took a mutual friend out to lunch (business stuff) and again, "Why is M single? She is amazing, perfect..blah blah blah.."
    My friend , who i think suspects I may be crushing on him, goes "Why don't you ask her out?"
    "shes not my type"

    I was crushed.
    He had given me so many mixed signals.Whenever we are in the same room at events or somewhere I always catch him looking at me, and then looks away. Sometimes I had seen him staring at me, then when i go over to say hi (as in at a restaurant, pub...) he acts surprised and goes "Oh hey! I didnt know you were here..."

    so a few days later he started texting me to see what my plans were for Christmas ( he was away visiting family) and I just rattled off stuff and then said "Oh and I have a date"
    He went radio silence for a few hours. Then later at night I got a text that only said "I hope he is kind"
    The night of my supposed date, he texts me at 11 pm to see how it went (not normal behavior)
    then continued to text me every few days during his vacation to see how my "guy" was.

    We have had many conversations, one culminating this past weekend. I asked him if he was going to an art opening that i and some other friends was in and he asked if X. and I were going ?I said I didnt know about X, i had not spoken to her in a few weeks, but I could find out.
    "no, dont ask her. I am going"
    He shows up, i see him looking at me, it was sooo crowded, by the time i got out of the conversation to go and say hi, he had left!

    anyways I text him to ask why he left without saying hi. He said it was too crowded, he was having dinner with his son.
    we continued to text till midnight. He talked about how he had no intention of ever opening up his heart, because then he would never get hurt again.But i did ask him what his type was
    and tall would be the cherry on top (he is 6'7")

    well i am olive skinned, green eyes, dark hair, smart and independent. BUT i am only 5'4"
    He is killing me with all the mixed messages.

    I will see him at a fundraiser on the 16th and plan on kind of confronting him (after fortifying myself with a glass of wine or two.)
    but I want to stack the deck in my favor.

    any advice for pheromones to wear? My order will be here by then. and I have other pheromones form before
    (P96, P81, ISa P78, TAL P104, Puppy Love)

    Whoever got to the end.. THANK YOU for the patience to read this!

  • #2
    Don't buy that "your not my type" nonsense. His actions speak volumes. Remember what he said, that he is afraid to open his heart. Personally I think he already has and is resisting it. I know you're frustrated by his mixed signals but be patient. Stay the course. Continue to be your amazing, perfect self. And by all means, no matter what else you use definitely include some P96. That stuff is magic.


    • KateD
      KateD commented
      Editing a comment
      Great minds think alike. Soo on point

  • #3
    Thanks! I was just reading a thread on P96... and i am fishing it out of my drawer tonight!
    Patience is not my strong suite!


    • KateD
      KateD commented
      Editing a comment
      You have hunter skills like Scottie? He doesn't stand a chance

  • #4
    Then we share something in common. lol


    • #5
      I have to agree with Scottie. The whole "not my type" thing may have been some rejection avoidance thing since you said he was shy, so he may have just been afraid to put himself out there by bluntly stating that he was into you. As for suggestions, I think NuTrix had some experiences with Xist for women. It seems like a good choice to add with the P96. I wish you luck.


      • #6
        Ohh...thanks, I will check out her experience! I should start a journal to keep track.i have a good handle on my AD money, but am really excited to try the ones I just ordered!


        • #7
          Scottie is one of the guys I would definitely recommend if you need a guy's perspective. And I am glad a guy was the first to respond so you can see how they think and feel.

          I personally don't listen to she is not my type and I like a girl who blah, blah , blah. I mean yes we all have preferences but you find that Confidence is Key. You make sure you go around like you are the best thing in the world and you will have everyone believing it

          And from his signals, you certainly have caught his attention.

          Dating and even trying to get into the world of someone who already has a family and in this situation is tough. Even if you two started dating you will need to remember not because his wife is dead doesn't mean he stopped loving her. He will love you but for you and at times you might feel like you are competing with someone who isn't there.

          The great thing about this guy is that you already know he is a settled guy , a family guy and he isn't one to throw his tools all over the place.

          I agree that you have to be patient and since he is shy then you might want to send a clear warning about your intentions and back away , wait to see if he will bite the bait.

          The chase is always better than the catch. That is how men are, so true you might have to make the first move but after that he needs to come to you. There will have to be a balance between putting yourself out there but getting him to follow your bread, crumb trail.

          A nice combination of social and sexual products should do the trick.

          Please keep us updated. Would love to see how this love story ends up.


          • MMj
            MMj commented
            Editing a comment
            Good advice! I know men like to chase, I didn't know how to balance letting him know how I feel and still letting him take control!thanks!!??????????

        • #8
          Welcome MMj!
          Oooo, what fun!!! Blossoming love

          You see him often? You have Xist on the way?

          If you choose to accept this mission...
          My instinct is to say Xist, Love Boat and Connections him, lol. If you can wait, wear those in combo around him a few times before confronting him. If you get P96, absolutely add that! Xist is stealthy, even if that was all you wore, it would be enough over several encounters. Because he's already attracted to you it will affect him all that much more (I'm speaking from experience ^_~).

          He likes you. A lot. Type or not (and really, your type is the one you like...right now. And that can surprise you so don't pay that comment any mind, lol) You have all the information you already need. At some point, if he doesn't move on his feelings, you may have to have that heart to heart. He may choose to deny himself, fearing a broken heart more than desiring a fulfilled one with you. But that's his call and nothing to do with you or how awesome you are. Imo, you already got this without mones, but there's nothing wrong with a little ace in the sleeve for good measure!

          Best of everything to you and your crush!
          You're never too old to learn NuTrix ^_~


          • MMj
            MMj commented
            Editing a comment
            Now I absolutely can't wait to try Xist! I am getting/already have everything you listed. I will dig up the patience needed for the bigger picture! Thank you!??????

        • #9
          Thanks KateD you're very sweet. I think that NuTrix is right about type being somewhat irrelevant. I've been into plenty of women who weren't my type. What they all had in common is that certain something that you can't put into words. When it all comes down to it, the heart wants what the heart wants. I think any woman who has had a crush can confirm that it often defies logic. Guys put up a good front but most aren't that different when it comes to love.

          It's obvious to anyone that he's really into you. Guys don't go around gushing about how amazing and perfect a woman is unless he's smitten. I have plenty of amazing gal pals but I don't talk about them like that.

          As a former shy guy I would recommend that you be open and honest. Communicate your interest. Be assertive but not aggressive. Shy guys don't respond well to alpha women. You could frighten him if you're too aggressive. Be confident but sweet. I'm sure I don't hafta tell you that love involves risks. You're gonna hafta be willing to put yourself out there. Remember that for him opening his heart is a huge risk. Losing someone you love is devastating. I know, it happened to me.

          Be patient with him. He's probably going to be wrestling some demons. Committing himself will be a big step. And as KateD said, be prepared to share his heart with his late wife. What you're undertaking WILL be challenging but if you truly care for him that much it will be worth it. Remember to walk a mile in his shoes and you should be ok.


          • MMj
            MMj commented
            Editing a comment
            Love you guys !I get what getting involved with him means. I'm not the clingy type or jealous. His love for his wife is part of what is so attractive about him.

        • #10
          I don't have any "phero advices" to you, but your love story got me hooked!

          ????I'll subscribe and hope to learn from your experience. I'm also back at the dating scene and since I'm a bit out of practice, any help is welcome. lol

          Good luck with your guy!


          • MMj
            MMj commented
            Editing a comment
            oh dating kind of sucks! especially at my age.. but this is different! I WILL CHRONICLE THIS SOAP OPERA

        • #11
          Do not chase him, let the pheromones do it instead and he will eventually come around.

          ??????Full bottles: Sport, Celebrity, Innocence, Connections, And Babe, Cohesion, Temptress, Thinker, Fantasy, Psel, Tease, Xist x 2, Odyssey, LoveBoat, Vibe, Madame, Bliss, Summer Daze (XS122), Fairy Tale Limitless, XSP86, Engage, Happiness, Sweetness, Glow, Bitch, XS194, xs189, xs190, xs191, xs193, xs196, xs199, Naked Gun, Mascot, Pencil Thin Mustache and XSP102, Goddess, Api. DM oil.

          LPMP: Heart & Soul, Lumina, Cougar, MLH, Blatant Invitation, Sexology, Sexpionage, Audacious, Levitation, Popularity Potion, LFM, LFN, True Confession, Empathy.


          • MMj
            MMj commented
            Editing a comment

          • NuTrix
            NuTrix commented
            Editing a comment

        • #12
          I wish MMj would show up again to update us in this. I'm soooo curious to hear what she wore and how it developed!


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