Originally posted by Cheerio
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How do you effectively build and maintain a roster of men?
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I predominately date white guys. Most of the time, they are too nervous to approach because they just aren't sure whether a Black woman is interested or not. I do get a lot of smiles from them and I guess they wait for my signal to come up to me. I think it's very attractive when a guy can approach me, even if he is nervous. I prefer that instead of me approaching. Ultimately, if a man is really interested, no nerves will stop him. I like traditional, dominant, and alpha men.
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Pheros seems to be a really good social lubricant. I don't drink either but pheros smooth things right out. GL with Temptress.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
I'm in New York.
If I do see a guy is staring at me and is struggling to come up to me, I will approach him. I will pretend I need directions (or if we're in a store, I'll ask him to grab something off the top shelf for me bc I'm short), and it will be up to him to start pursing me now that I've given him the green light. This is the more modern way of signaling a guy to talk to you. Back then, women used to "accidentally" drop their handkerchiefs in front of their target(s) so that he could pick it up and rush to return it to them.
Took me a while to understand that approaching =/= pursuing.
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I'm in New York.
If I do see a guy is staring at me and is struggling to come up to me, I will approach him. I will pretend I need directions (or if we're in a store, I'll ask him to grab something off the top shelf for me bc I'm short), and it will be up to him to start pursing me now that I've given him the green light. This is the more modern way of signaling a guy to talk to you. Back then, women used to "accidentally" drop their handkerchiefs in front of their target(s) so that he could pick it up and rush to return it to them.
Took me a while to understand that approaching =/= pursuing.
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Originally posted by colorfulaura View PostIt's the summertime and I'm ready to be courted and woo'd this time around. Winter and spring have been so slow for me with serious dating prospects, but I get as many bachelors as how serious I am in investing energy into my dating life. I'm ready to level up for the next 6 months.
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It's the summertime and I'm ready to be courted and woo'd this time around. Winter and spring have been so slow for me with serious dating prospects, but I get as many bachelors as how serious I am in investing energy into my dating life. I'm ready to level up for the next 6 months.
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Originally posted by Vicki Lee View Post
Sexual compatibility to me is just as an important aspect to ME as emotional, spiritual, etc. aspects. It ranks high as it can go, because I have special quirks in the bedroom that need to be met or I'm just wasting my time in the long haul.
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Originally posted by Metaltree View Post
Now that I think about it, I agree with you on this.
Also, it might make sense to have sex with a guy before putting him on the roster so you can find out if he is good and compatible in bed. Pointless to keep a guy around as a LTR prospect if he is not good in bed unless that is not important to you.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
The only thing I'd correct is the last bit. Don't hookup with any of them at all. Dating & having sex aren't the same but it seems the word "dating" has become synonymous with sex (and it shouldn't). It's crazy to me how many people can't date each other without becoming physical. Most times, it's because the woman is afraid the man will lose interest, so she gives in too fast. If a man loses interest because he doesn't get to pelvic-slap with you, then he was the never the man for you to begin with.
Also, it might make sense to have sex with a guy before putting him on the roster so you can find out if he is good and compatible in bed. Pointless to keep a guy around as a LTR prospect if he is not good in bed unless that is not important to you.
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Originally posted by Cheerio View Post
The only thing I'd correct is the last bit. Don't hookup with any of them at all. Dating & having sex aren't the same but it seems the word "dating" has become synonymous with sex (and it shouldn't). It's crazy to me how many people can't date each other without becoming physical. Most times, it's because the woman is afraid the man will lose interest, so she gives in too fast. If a man loses interest because he doesn't get to pelvic-slap with you, then he was the never the man for you to begin with.
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